Sometimes you just have to stop and laugh at yourself! Such a time happened to me today as we were homeschooling.
I was coming off of a week in which I hadn’t gotten much sleep at all – sometimes I have crazy energy and I can’t sleep! It’s odd because my body feels exhausted but my brain just won’t allow me to rest, lol. As you probably know when you are physically exhausted often times your actions don’t always make sense, lol. We all ate breakfast, my husband left for work, devotions done, and we were off and running w/ school.
Well into our day, we were midway through our math lesson… I was giving my son verbal instruction and he looked at me confused. So I raised my voice a bit and began to repeat the instructions the exact same way as I had the first time – word for word – just louder. Then the strangest thing happened. Have you ever had a moment when everything seems to go in slow motion? Well this was my ‘slow motion’ moment, lol. While I was repeating the instructions everything slowed down and I noticed my sons eyes widening and my mouth widening… then I noticed my daughter was now looking on. What was wrong here? And then I realized the stupidity of the moment… I was repeating instructions that my son clearly did not understand the exact way I had said it the first time – which was the way I had initally confused him to begin with. Somehow in my sleepy logic I decided, without discussing it with my brain, that hey, I think he just didn’t hear me. Perhaps if I tell him louder he will get it. Good logic? I think not! I was so thankful to have caught myself midsentence and correct myself… I stayed at that volume and said “why am I talking so loudly? and why am I repeating myself? and why am I asking questions out loud?” We all busted out laughing at moms silly logic, I stopped and apologized to them both, and we were able to safely recover and go on about our school day – giggling.
That moment really got me thinking… how important not just what I say is, but, also, how I say it really is. I know we hear that all the time, but I tell you, there is nothing like looking in your childs eyes and realizing in that very moment that the words you choose to speak next will determine how that child will feel about themselves. I could see in my sons eyes that how I ended my sentence was going to determine who and what was going to be hurt. Was it going to be my pride, or his feelings? How much more important is my son’s feelings to me than my pride or than any math lesson for that matter — A TON MORE IMPORTANT!!! It reminded me how in our everyday lives as mothers, teachers, homemakers, wives, friends, etc… how much power we wield just in our tongues. The power to build up, the power to tear down, the power to bless, the power to anger, the power to love, to hate… we can make someone feel like the most important person in the whole world! Or, contrarily, we could make someone feel as if they are not wanted, that they are in the way, inadequate, a burden… so much power in a single breath. I often wish this wasn’t true. The importance of devotions leaps into my heart upon this realization… I cannot afford to miss that time. Afterall, how am I to correctly reflect to my children the truth about who they are in God’s eyes if I do not take that time with God so He can remind me how special I am to Him… How special they are to Him! I found myself praying in my heart “Please Lord, let the words I speak to my children today be a blessing to them and to you. Help me to slow down and remember the importance of the tasks you have layed before me today… the eternal importance… Thank you so much God for entrusting me with these precious gifts… help me to remember that, that is exactly what they are – precious gifts. What an honor it is to serve you Lord in this capacity! Thank you Lord, thank you, thank you.”
Today I have took out a notecard and wrote this verse on it:
““Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them.” Mark 10: 14-16
then I posted it by our homeschool area so I would see it often and remember…