Confession #2: I often question myself, struggle with feelings of inadequacy, and my real reason *why* I homeschool is not what you’d expect.
Do you ever get to the end of a week and feel like your sole purpose in living was just to make others feel good about their lives? I had a few moments that had me wondering if that was my *high calling* this week.
Late this past summer, I found myself getting an attitude. The, “I don’t want to”, attitude that plague’s me from time to time. I have a special little “word” that sums it all up -*Ugh*.
One word, many meanings, and it’s easily measurable. Broken down into 4 levels, it looks like this…
1.) The mildly irritated, I’ll do it tomorrow *ugh*
- Often let out as more of a sigh (sometimes long / sometimes short, an exhale)
- Audible distance: unless they were sitting on your lap, no one probably heard.
- Looks-wise: you still manage to look *pretty* under pressure.
2.) The lukewarm, why is this happening to me *ugh*
Ever been angry? Probably not 😉 But, I have!
Being a parent provides multiple opportunities for anger to rear it’s ugly head. Sometimes I don’t even recognize that I’m irritated, much less angry… that is, until I’m about to *BUST*. Other times, I can actually feel the tension building inside. …boiling… stirring… festering…
“Would you rather have armpit hair so long it reached to your toes… but you could braid it and you always smelled good… or normal length armpit hair but you always have terrible body odor? “… and so begins our Mommy/Kids date night!
I am always looking for ways to create fun memories with my kids… ones that they will think about long after I’m gone
My kids are the hot sauce in my life! They add that extra *kick* that really makes life special. Today my youngest, who is prone to random acts of silliness, struck again!
Scene: Bookshelf – we have a shelf where we keep study Bibles/references etc… DaiseyMae, my youngest, takes a stool, walks over to the bookshelf, steps up onto it. She grabs the sides of the bookcase (she is now able to see that bookshelf clearly and peer even behind the books). She studies the books for a minute… she squints her eyes and keeps searching… she runs her fingers carefully over each book… She gets up on her tip toes, stretches as tall as she can. I watch as she bends her neck this way and that, carefully looking between all the books… then she sticks her head deep into the bookcase and asks loudly
A little info to stick in your pocket as you read this post… “A sneaker wave is a disproportionately large coastal wave that can sometimes appear in a wave train without warning… Because they are much larger than preceding waves, sneaker waves can catch unwary swimmers, washing them out to sea. It is not uncommon for people walking or standing on beaches and ocean jetties to be washed into the sea.” (Wikipedia)
Funny how you are just going about your day, never dreaming that in a matter of months you’d be in a different home, your spouse would have a different job, different income, you’d be living in a different city, different culture, and completely out of your comfort zone… not to mention far away from family and friends. But it does happen, and it happens everyday to lots of different people. Why should we be exempt?
…And change, often, doesn’t come slowly… it doesn’t stop and ask “Hey, just checking in. Are you ready for this? Or would you prefer that?” And “Would you like that in 1, or 2, month increments?”
Born April 16, 1977 – Died January 25, 2011
Born June 22, 1916 – Died October 6th, 2001
Born September 21st, 1983 – Died October 16th 1983
With each step new dates came into sight, and a new story was told by pictures, objects, letters, left on the cemetary plot. I couldn’t help but wonder what the real story of each life was… Seemed strange that even though everyone of these people lived very different lives, probably very different lifestyles, came from very different economical backgrounds, and families… they all now
Years before our kids were even old enough for pre-k I can remember pouring over countless books, curriculum catalogs, and homeschool forums. I studied learning styles, teaching methods, curriculum approaches, and multiple intelligences. I spent hoards of time listening to lectures, webinars, programs, guessing what my childrens learning styles would be. Then I’d spend months more researching curriculum for what would *best* suit them. I interviewed other homeschool moms, asked lots of questions, and came up with a fool proof plan of attack. Or so I thought…
By the time our oldest was 4, I had his educational path well planned out. I knew what curriculum would be best for him, how to teach him, and how to troubleshoot every possible obstacle from pre-K to college. I was prepared. Sure I was a bit nervous, but how hard can pre-K be? Right?! Wrong…